Pearlie, my service cat by default

There comes a time, maybe it’s due to getting older, I’m not sure, but there is that time when we simply have to accept our defects, they are so glaring. And, instead of trying to hide them inside of our passions or passionate ideologies, we have no choice but to realize, yes, I do this. Maybe because they are sort of mild I can accept them, or maybe because I share their acknowledgment with most of my family and even my pets, they have become an integral part of who I am, and without them, I would not be me. And I’m not even talking about any nasty habits that seriously affect the other members of my family, like smoking or spraying scents around the room that some of my kids are allergic to. I don’t do these things, so I am not on that particular tract of causing unnecessary harm. But I do other things, and my cat Pearl has let me know she is well aware of it.

I have this unusual habit of walking out of the kitchen or the bathroom when the water in the sink is still running. I have had this tendency for years. My kids and others in my family who have noticed this are never hesitant to reprimand me in a very kind but exasperated way that, once again, I have left the water running. It’s not a harmful type of a thing – I’m not going to set the house on fire with this and most of the time the water is running into an empty sink, so I won’t cause a flood, but it is just a reminder of a negligence, and where you have one negligence, there can be others. It may be a sign.

So, thankful to say, I am trying to keep myself abreast of this and remember to turn off the water after I use it, both in the kitchen and the bathroom. In addition to wasting this precious national resource, I most definitely increased my water bill upwards of tens of dollars, something I hardly can afford to do, and it is all a waste. Years ago, I left the water running and left for work, a 9 hour stretch until I again got home. You can only imagine the expense and waste of that. Thank G-d, the water ran continuously down the sink and there were no blockages.

And then there’s Pearlie, my tiny fluffy ball of love that I have had since 2006 when she was born from a stray in my yard … she looks like a pearl … white with grey swirls of fluffy fur …. And pink ears …. Her lineage must have Siamese, because she looks so much like a Siamese cat except for her chubby round face.

Pearlie has been with me for over 10 years, and she knows everything that goes on around the house. She is strictly a house cat. I once tried to let her out only to discover an enormous welt over her eye – she almost lost that eye from being attacked by another street cat – so that ended me letting her out, and in the house she has stayed since, over the past 9 years or so now.

So it is not by surprise – although it was a tremendous surprise to me when it happened – that Pearlie would be aware and alert to my defects, particularly this running water issue. And it happened just last week that I was washing dishes with my usual cold water (I am grateful that my water issue doesn’t increase my hot water bill – I only use cold water for everything except when I take a shower ) in the kitchen sink and my phone rang in the other room. Loyal to my water issue, I simply walked away from the sink, unaware that the water was still running.

The phone conversation took me into the living room and then into one of the bed rooms and onto my computer, where I had to look up something and it was quite a while until I was able to stop. What actually caught my attention was Pearlie, making unusually distressing noises from the kitchen. All of my cats have their own noises and ways they call me, and Pearl makes this particular noise when she has used the litter box and is alerting me to clean it, and also when she has caught a palmetto or water bug or a gecko and is calling me to come and look (I love gecko’s, and usually rush very quickly to see if I could save it from her …usually she has not done much harm and is in the early stages of attacking it and is calling me to see what she caught – if it has not been harmed, I quickly grab it and set it outside to reclaim the rest of its life). But this day when I was on the computer after my phone call, Pearlie was making this noise and I thought she might have caught a gecko so I was very quick to come and see ….

And she was simply sitting in front of my kitchen sink, making this distressing urgent type of noise …. She caught nothing …. She was simply letting me know that I left the water running ….. 

I cannot describe the feeling I have of gratitude to these tiny creatures that really do look over us. Even when we feel we are so advanced and capable, they are there to fill the void, to correct the hidden and embarrassing flaws. It is amazing to me how they cover for us.

Over the years, I have given myself credit continuously for things that I consider remarkable – even to the point of haughtiness. At 61, I still mow my own lawn in the Florida heat and work completely online as a registrar for a virtual college, something that many of my friends of this age cannot even fathom to do. Even mowing my own lawn and creating butterfly gardens, spending hours in the yard in the Florida heat scares even my own adult children. I now live by myself with my cats and a rescue chicken and manage to keep my house in one piece – and keep myself functioning as well. And then I have additional private victories that I have become so arrogant about, personal accomplishments to gloat on - even in private. But all this self adulation just crumbles when your tiny cat calls to you from the kitchen that you left your sink water running. How fantastic is that? How truly helpless am I without something like this?

Of all the things I am passionate about, protecting animals probably tops the list. Not only because we have such a remarkable mitzvah in our Holy Torah not to harm animals, but because so often they are our helpers, sent from HaShem. I used to think that that saying ‘G-d couldn’t be everywhere, so He created mothers’ was very true, but now I realize that mothers cannot even hold a candle to some of these remarkable creatures He created to help us. When we least expect it, we are given creatures that befriend and care for us, even unaware.

Our Mitzvos Could Save The World .....

One of the reasons I find blogging so satisfying is that I have so much to say, but I cannot speak in public. I have tried. I have a teacher's license and have reduced myself to being a tutor because I cannot speak to more than about one person at a time. But I love to write, so blogging pretty much comes naturally.

Because I have become religious from a non-religious background, I have lived a great portion of my life very differently from the way I live now. Currently, and for the past almost 30 years, I have taken on many of the mitzvos of observant Judaism. I keep kosher and will not eat from a non-kosher kitchen. This causes me to have to reject my many invitations for meals from almost all of my relatives who do not have kosher kitchens. It is very painful. I also keep Shabbos, from Friday just before sundown to Saturday evening one hour after sundown. This has secluded me from many family occasions, as I do not drive or visit people who do not keep Shabbos on Shabbos. Painful, again.

Plus, I married a man who didn't want to be as observant as I did, and, after two attempts at sustaining married life, I divorced him for a second time. He attends ashrams in the summer in upstate NY and lives a life much more 'liberated' than mine is. Painful again.

However, there is an entire community that I live in that is strictly kosher and keeps a very strict Shabbos, so I feel right at home here. However, I live alone, as my children have grown and moved on. I am considering moving to a location where there are more single older Jews like myself. However, many might not be as observant. Such is the Jewish world.

One thing I have observed about Jews since becoming observant more than 30 years ago is that Jews don't push Judaism on non-Jews. They hardly push observance on their own. In a sentence, Jews keep their religion to themselves, which is really refreshing at this time in history where every headline reeks of every atrocity imaginable in the name of religion. Yet I am trying to come to terms with the idea that we are such an introverted, internal religion. Would the world be a better place if we proselytized our mitzvot and broadcasted our davening for all to see? If we threatened injury or worse if everyone didn't keep kosher? or shabbos? or wear tznius? or speak loshon hatov (nice speech and words)?  Might we be neglecting some sort of Tikkun olam by keeping all this to ourselves?

Hands down, I feel the Jewish religion via the Torah is the best religion in the world. I contains the most sensitive and authentic form of both social and individual justice around. I demands kindness to animals and nature and love for each other. It permits non-Jews the highest level of respect as long as they respect our religion and refrain from influencing Jews to abandon our mitzvot. And, most of all, it reveals G-d's tremendous love for his creatures and his creation, our world and everything in it. The mitzvot regarding how to treat and care for animals, trees, the soil, other people's things, and each other dwarfs any doctrine, secular or religious, that has come from any other people since the beginning of time. I have read the entire Torah numerous times, and the only people who criticize the Torah, in my mind, are people who have never read it.

Oddly enough, our mitzvos might have become the best kept secret in the world, as well. I don't quite know the reason behind our prohibition against proselytizing, but I know that it is such a strong phenomenon that Jews have slowly become the smallest nation in the world. Orthodox Jews are instructed to reject potential converts three times, and if their resolve to join the Jewish nation is so strong after these three rejections, we have to (albeit reluctantly) let them in.

I am starting to wonder if our self-imposed religious seclusion is healthy, or even good. In a world where the two largest religious have very cunning and seriously painful tactics to get others to join their ranks, observant Jews simply avoid those who are not part of their group. In a religious sense, Jews have embodied the 'lamb among wolves' persona .... we haven't a clue of how huge and dangerous these other religions are. We are simply incapable of joining in the competition.

In so many ways, I feel truly grateful and blessed not to belong to one of those camps who believe 'might is right' or that I won't get to heaven unless I accept their version of g-d. I am grateful that I don't belong to a religion that has to bully others to prove they are right. But on the other hand, Jews are dwindling. We are losing ground and even the majority of our own people cannot fully identify their own identity. If the mitzvot identify Judaism, as they have for previous generations, how can a non-observant Jew identify as Jewish? This was a question I had for years prior to becoming observant. I still don't think I would have an answer had I not become observant.

I believe in G-d, the Jewish Torah version of G-d. A G-d that has created a fantastic world. An awesome world from a thoroughly awesome Creator. Someone who created the most magnificent forms of life, from caterpillars to butterflies, from earthworms to elephants. This is a thoroughly fantastic awesome world, and G-d created all of it. And He wrote in his Torah that He wants us to respect it, and care properly for it. G-d is, and was, the original environmentalist. It is His planet. He does not want us to trash it. It's all in the Torah.

And I think that, because Jews are so inclusive and seclusive, and private, we have not revealed these truths. Not that we should, but it would help the world to know that we have a G-d that does not want us to take down fruit trees, or plant the nutrients out of the soil without giving it a rest, or live in cities without proper sewage disposal. We have a G-d that has instructed us to uphold the poor through donations and concerted efforts to help them support themselves. We have a G-d that wants the world to work, and wants people to make that happen.

As things are now, we have a world where no one would listen, because more and more people hate Jews and hate our religion. Even the majority of Jews are afraid of their own religion. Judaism remains the best kept secret ever. It is a hidden treasure and formula that could easily save the world.

It's just my thoughts, by Yoheved.