One of the reasons I find blogging so satisfying is that I have so much to say, but I cannot speak in public. I have tried. I have a teacher's license and have reduced myself to being a tutor because I cannot speak to more than about one person at a time. But I love to write, so blogging pretty much comes naturally.
Because I have become religious from a non-religious background, I have lived a great portion of my life very differently from the way I live now. Currently, and for the past almost 30 years, I have taken on many of the mitzvos of observant Judaism. I keep kosher and will not eat from a non-kosher kitchen. This causes me to have to reject my many invitations for meals from almost all of my relatives who do not have kosher kitchens. It is very painful. I also keep Shabbos, from Friday just before sundown to Saturday evening one hour after sundown. This has secluded me from many family occasions, as I do not drive or visit people who do not keep Shabbos on Shabbos. Painful, again.
Plus, I married a man who didn't want to be as observant as I did, and, after two attempts at sustaining married life, I divorced him for a second time. He attends ashrams in the summer in upstate NY and lives a life much more 'liberated' than mine is. Painful again.
However, there is an entire community that I live in that is strictly kosher and keeps a very strict Shabbos, so I feel right at home here. However, I live alone, as my children have grown and moved on. I am considering moving to a location where there are more single older Jews like myself. However, many might not be as observant. Such is the Jewish world.
One thing I have observed about Jews since becoming observant more than 30 years ago is that Jews don't push Judaism on non-Jews. They hardly push observance on their own. In a sentence, Jews keep their religion to themselves, which is really refreshing at this time in history where every headline reeks of every atrocity imaginable in the name of religion. Yet I am trying to come to terms with the idea that we are such an introverted, internal religion. Would the world be a better place if we proselytized our mitzvot and broadcasted our davening for all to see? If we threatened injury or worse if everyone didn't keep kosher? or shabbos? or wear tznius? or speak loshon hatov (nice speech and words)? Might we be neglecting some sort of Tikkun olam by keeping all this to ourselves?
Hands down, I feel the Jewish religion via the Torah is the best religion in the world. I contains the most sensitive and authentic form of both social and individual justice around. I demands kindness to animals and nature and love for each other. It permits non-Jews the highest level of respect as long as they respect our religion and refrain from influencing Jews to abandon our mitzvot. And, most of all, it reveals G-d's tremendous love for his creatures and his creation, our world and everything in it. The mitzvot regarding how to treat and care for animals, trees, the soil, other people's things, and each other dwarfs any doctrine, secular or religious, that has come from any other people since the beginning of time. I have read the entire Torah numerous times, and the only people who criticize the Torah, in my mind, are people who have never read it.
Oddly enough, our mitzvos might have become the best kept secret in the world, as well. I don't quite know the reason behind our prohibition against proselytizing, but I know that it is such a strong phenomenon that Jews have slowly become the smallest nation in the world. Orthodox Jews are instructed to reject potential converts three times, and if their resolve to join the Jewish nation is so strong after these three rejections, we have to (albeit reluctantly) let them in.
I am starting to wonder if our self-imposed religious seclusion is healthy, or even good. In a world where the two largest religious have very cunning and seriously painful tactics to get others to join their ranks, observant Jews simply avoid those who are not part of their group. In a religious sense, Jews have embodied the 'lamb among wolves' persona .... we haven't a clue of how huge and dangerous these other religions are. We are simply incapable of joining in the competition.
In so many ways, I feel truly grateful and blessed not to belong to one of those camps who believe 'might is right' or that I won't get to heaven unless I accept their version of g-d. I am grateful that I don't belong to a religion that has to bully others to prove they are right. But on the other hand, Jews are dwindling. We are losing ground and even the majority of our own people cannot fully identify their own identity. If the mitzvot identify Judaism, as they have for previous generations, how can a non-observant Jew identify as Jewish? This was a question I had for years prior to becoming observant. I still don't think I would have an answer had I not become observant.
I believe in G-d, the Jewish Torah version of G-d. A G-d that has created a fantastic world. An awesome world from a thoroughly awesome Creator. Someone who created the most magnificent forms of life, from caterpillars to butterflies, from earthworms to elephants. This is a thoroughly fantastic awesome world, and G-d created all of it. And He wrote in his Torah that He wants us to respect it, and care properly for it. G-d is, and was, the original environmentalist. It is His planet. He does not want us to trash it. It's all in the Torah.
And I think that, because Jews are so inclusive and seclusive, and private, we have not revealed these truths. Not that we should, but it would help the world to know that we have a G-d that does not want us to take down fruit trees, or plant the nutrients out of the soil without giving it a rest, or live in cities without proper sewage disposal. We have a G-d that has instructed us to uphold the poor through donations and concerted efforts to help them support themselves. We have a G-d that wants the world to work, and wants people to make that happen.
As things are now, we have a world where no one would listen, because more and more people hate Jews and hate our religion. Even the majority of Jews are afraid of their own religion. Judaism remains the best kept secret ever. It is a hidden treasure and formula that could easily save the world.
It's just my thoughts, by Yoheved.
